Friendships/Best Friend

I'm venting to you guys because i really need to vent. i have this friend who i claim be my best friend we been best friends for over 13 years thats a long time but over the years iv been hit over and over everyday, verbally abused she likes to call me stupid and idiot all that and my favorite iv been left out of everything. i would never do any of that to my friends because I'm a great friend who there for them when they need me. i invite her everywhere! i take to parties, restaurants, the beach AND cruise to Mexico. i buy her whatever she wants if i have the money. i do nothing but give, give and give. I'm not asking for much here just some respect.

well today the went to the beach, i hinted out plenty of times i wanted to go i even went as far to say i wish i could a went. because she likes to tell me these thing as there on the highway she even said ok next time ill invite you. oh look its next time all i got was a text "woot woot going to the beach." i already knew that from that text they left and i got new invite. i was crushed. 

i just don't get it am i asking for to much? i know i should tell her how i feel everytime i do we end up fighting so i keep it in i cry and complain to my bf then i forget. i love and go by the quote "Forgive & Forget"  I'm forgiving now I'm going to forget after this post. its ok one day when she does something bad ill just give up and tell her what my problem is sometimes i think I'm at my breaking point. I'm not one of those people who post about a problem about someone online so they see it and there not sure who's it about but they have an idea its them, you get me? oh well i think its time to go watch a funny movie i have my warm tea i venting. i actually feel better. thank you everyone. I'm going to start putting up a poll vote so i can get an idea. it will change ever overtime i post. 

Love Rylee i hope you have a wonder day <3 because its 2:03pm here. maybe its night time there so Good Night! sweet dreams  

Poetry

   hello everyone
 sorry its been awhile life has been ok but i need to vent >.< venting makes me feel better. nothing much is new iv ben having more dreams about my x-bf i can't help but think about him. i miss him so much it sucks it makes want to hugs him and laugh with him and spend time with him moving on I'm learning to let go. letting go is hard BUT iv been thinking to myself lol i want to write a book i have an idea but Im not sure what i do with it after if i finished I'm not a much of a writer but i just feel like it and the idea i have feel great maybe interesting and different I'm not sure well see what happens i got my cat Zeus a new litterbox so he likes to eat it and sit on it o.o its looks like kinda like an ig glue its around with stairs. he kinda acts like a puppy he loves to eat everything it annoys the crap out of me. he ate my bf headphone 30 dollar headphones like 3 times. overtime i yell at him no bad cat you have my dog behind me and barking at the cat she's like my back up. so were both yelling at the ca. o.o overtime he does something wrong my dog there to stop him for me. OH before i get carried away the point of the tittle. i use to write poetry when i was sad it made me feel better it may not be good but I'm proud of it . . . .

Black As Night

A rose as black as night 

Blacker then the heart that acks 

Inside my dead body 

In witch thats colder then ice itself 

Paler then the full moon 

A heart that acks from being broken 

Broken from a man that betrayed me 

Betrayal the worst of them all 

No wonder why i can not bare my life 

A rose black as death 

Dead like the Red Rose that bleed 

from inside the heart. 

My heart that can no longer live 

I ack from pain that i wish was not mine 

I wish the my heart would stop 

I do not wish to live my life 

The pain is to much to bare.

this one not my first but it was one of my favorite. i only wrote when I'm sad it like a fire it gets me going. but i haven't been that sad in while so its been a long time since i written. but its ok one day ill find something else to inspire me and ill wrote practice my poetry and again. thats it for today

 Good night everyone i hope your having a wonderfull day love rylee